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Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In

Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In


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About the Book

People won’t put up with being “sold” anymore. If they sense they are being pushed, their guard goes up—and even if they do comply, lingering resentment undermines the relationship...maybe forever. Yet, most books on influence still portray it as something you “do to” someone else to get your way. That out-of-date approach invites resistance or cynicism from those who recognize the techniques. Manipulative tactics might occasionally wear down a colleague’s or client’s resistance, but they fail to produce the mutual trust that sustains successful relationships. In short, they just won’t work in our sophisticated, post-selling world. In this groundbreaking book, authors Mark Goulston and John Ullmen reveal a new model for authentic influence—the kind that creates a strong initial connection and survives long after agreement has been reached. Based on listening, genuine engagement and commitment to win-win outcomes, Real Influence provides a powerful four-step method you can use to: • Examine your priorities • Learn about the key players and what they need • Earn their attention and motivate them to hear more • Add value with your questions and actions Complete with examples of the steps in action and insights from real-world “power influencers,” this one-of-a-kind guide shows that being straight with everyone means winning for all. www.getrealinfluence.com

Table of Contents:
CONTENTS Foreword by Keith Ferrazzi ix Introduction 1 SECTION 1 The Problem: Why Are You Struggling to Influence People? 5 1 The Dangers of “Disconnect” 7 2 Four Traps That “Disconnect” You 18 3 The Four Steps to Connecting and Influencing 33 SECTION 2 STEP #1 Go for Great Outcomes 41 4 The First “R”: Go for a Great Result 43 5 The Second “R”: Go for a Great Reputation 52 6 The Third “R”: Go for Great Relationships 66 SECTION 3 STEP #2 Listen Past Your Blind Spot 81 7 To Discover Their There, Listen to the Music 83 8 Master Level-Four Listening 91 9 To Influence, Be Influenceable 107 SECTION 4 STEP #3 Engage Them in Their There 119 10 Use the Three Gets of Engage 121 11 Push Their Buttons— Positively 135 12 Engage Across Cultures 144 SECTION 5 STEP #4 When You’ve Done Enough . . . Do More 155 13 Do More Before, During, and After 157 14 Do More in All Three Value Channels 171 15 Ask Other People to Do More 183 SECTION 6 Taking Real Influence to the Next Level 191 16 Let Adversity Lead You to Great Outcomes 193 17 Influence by Getting Out of the Way 203 18 Influence Positively After You’ve Made Big Mistakes 210 19 Let Gratitude Magnify Your Influence 219 SECTION 7 Putting It All Together 227 20 Case Study #1—A Fuzzy Rescue 229 21 Case Study #2—Everything Matters 234 22 Case Study #3—Poised for Life 237 23 Case Study #4—Taming a Temperamental Group 241 Epilogue 245 Acknowledgments 247 Index 251 About the Authors 259

About the Author :
Mark Goulston, MD, is a business advisor, consultant, coach, speaker, and psychiatrist. The author of Get Out of Your Own Way and other popular books, he blogs for Harvard Business Review, Fast Company, Business Insider, The Huffington Post, and Psychology Today; and he is featured frequently in major media, including The Wall Street Journal, Fortune, Newsweek, Time, CNN, Fox News, and the TODAY Show. JOHN ULLMEN, PH.D., is an acclaimed executive coach whose clients include dozens of leading international firms. He oversees MotivationRules.com, conducts popular feedback-based seminars on influence in organizations, and teaches at the UCLA Anderson School of Management.

Review :
"[Real Influence] offers a full course banquet of fresh ideas for the price of a modest dinner." --Inland Empire Business Journal


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Product Details
  • ISBN-13: 9780814420157
  • Publisher: Amacom
  • Publisher Imprint: Amacom
  • Height: 93 mm
  • No of Pages: 272
  • Returnable: N
  • Weight: 1 gr
  • ISBN-10: 081442015X
  • Publisher Date: 16 Feb 2013
  • Binding: Hardback
  • Language: English
  • Returnable: N
  • Spine Width: 9 mm
  • Width: 63 mm


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