The Leader on the Couch: A Clinical Approach to Changing People and Organizations

Despite the proven benefits of emotional intelligence, organizational life has typically been hostile to the inner world of feeling. Rationality is deemed superior to feeling, which can contaminate judgment. But without feeling there is no passion, and no action. This book sets out to change people and organizations for the better, by revealing the 'dark side' of leadership behaviour and its impact on performance. Tapping into the startling parallels between the journey to emotional intelligence, the process of psychoanalysis, the practice of leadership coaching and the Zen journey to enlightenment, renowned thinker Manfred Kets de Vries helps executives, consultants, and coaches to peel back the layers of self-deception and reveal how inner personality – largely hard-wired since early childhood – affects the way they lead and manage others.

Table of Contents:
Preface xiii 1 Introduction: The Clinical Paradigm 1 Giving the unconscious its due 3 Tapping into psychoanalytic theories and techniques 6 Philosophical underpinnings of the clinical paradigm 9 The inner theater 11 Motivational need systems 13 Core conflictual relationship themes 15 Using the clinical paradigm to rewrite dysfunctional scripts 16 References 17 Part One: Entering the Inner Theater of Leaders 21 2 The Narcissistic Leader: Myth and Reality 23 Back to the future 25 Two modern myths: healthy neglect and tough love 28 Narcissistic personality disorders 31 Another fi ne Messier 33 Lost in space: introducing the T-word 42 Downsizing the narcissist 45 References 49 3 A Parade of Personalities 51 A question of character 52 Assessing leaders and followers 56 The dramatic disposition 59 The dramatic individual within the organization 62 The controlling disposition 63 The controlling individual within the organization 68 The dependent disposition 70 The dependent individual within the organization 74 The self-defeating disposition 75 The self-defeating individual within the organization 79 References 80 4 Leaders and Followers: Moving Away From People 83 The detached disposition 84 The detached individual within the organization 91 The depressive disposition 94 Depressives within the organization 98 References 100 5 Leaders and Followers: Moving Against People 101 The abrasive disposition 103 Abrasives within the organization 106 The paranoid disposition 110 The paranoid disposition within the organization 114 The negativistic disposition 118 The negativistic individual within the organization 123 The antisocial disposition 124 Antisocials within the organization 127 Prototypes and beyond 130 Table 5.1: An overview of the spectrum of personalities 131 References 132 6 Elation and Its Vicissitudes 135 The gift and curse of charisma 138 The sirens of hypomania 142 Surviving the “maniac” 151 References 155 7 The Impostor Syndrome: The Shadow Side of Success 157 Being a fraud versus feeling fraudulent 160 The fear of success 163 The dread of not living up to expectations 166 Infecting the organization 172 A search for origins 175 The light at the end of the tunnel 177 References 184 Part Two: Changing Mindsets 187 8 Can Leaders Change? Yes, But Only If They Want To 189 Why ride a dead horse? 191 Change and the triangle of mental life 193 Figure 8.1: Triangle of mental life 193 Hitting your head against the wall 194 The CEO “recycling” seminar 196 Looking in on “the challenge of leadership” 199 Theoretical underpinnings 203 References 207 9 Taking The Road Less Traveled 211 Owning your own life 212 Challenge 1: preparing for the journey 213 Case study 215 Catalysts for change 218 Challenge 2: identifying the problem 220 Major themes for executives 221 The triangle of conflict 226 Figure 9.1: Triangle of conflict 227 Challenge 3: unhooking “false connections” 230 Figure 9.2: Triangle of relationships 231 Linking the past with the present 232 Challenge 4: creating a holding environment 234 Challenge 5: actively working on the problem 235 Restructuring the inner theater 239 Keeping on track 243 Challenge 6: consolidating the change 244 Making the best of a poor hand of cards 245 References 247 10 Coach or Couch, Anybody? 251 Who are the clients? 254 What is leadership coaching? 256 Short-term psychotherapy versus leadership coaching 258 The coaching parade 262 The fundamentals of coaching: why and how 263 What makes for coaching success? 265 The vicissitudes of leadership coaching 269 References 273 11 Group Leadership Coaching 275 A case in point 277 Getting started 279 Gathering data 280 Figure 11.1: Sample personal graph 281 Figure 11.2: Sample personality audit graph 283 Group leadership coaching dynamics 285 Creating high-EQ teams 291 Figure 11.3: Leadership group coaching 295 Making group leadership coaching work in executive teams 296 The role of commitment and follow-up 296 The role of storytelling 297 The role of trust 298 References 300 Part Three: Understanding the Psychodynamics of Groups and Organizations 303 12 The Unconscious Life of Groups and Organizations 305 Basic group assumptions 311 The organizational ideal 316 Neurotic organizations 322 Organizational archetypes 323 Strengths of each style 325 Placing leaders on the couch 327 References 328 13 Unraveling The Mystery of Organizations 331 Clinical organizational interventions 332 Focal areas of intervention 333 The prickly CEO 337 Through the looking glass: the Stratec collusion 341 Consulting with the third ear 354 Connecting with a clinically informed consultant 357 Staying in for the long haul 358 Emulating Sherlock Holmes 359 References 362 14 Conclusion: Creating “Authentizotic” Organizations 363 Transcending the leadership crisis 368 True self versus false self 369 Authenticity: beyond the gulag organization 375 References 381 Index 383