Have you ever wondered why your relationships keep falling apart?
Why is marriage no longer seen as an appealing requirement or the ultimate goal of dating and relationships?
Or why the broken pieces between sex, love, and fidelity never seem to fit together?
The Consequence of Choice guides us through a unique exploration of relationship conflicts, viewed through women's romantic decisions and their desired outcomes. It also examines how men interpret women's choices, whether men's reactions are instinctive, and how their actions often fail to align with the ideal goals women pursue. The author, Bernard R. Pilgrim, who has been married for twenty-six years, believes that by critically examining our assumptions about dating, relationships, and marriage, we can gain a deeper understanding and more effectively embrace fidelity and intimacy. Making our dating choices based on reality rather than unrealistic expectations can help us avoid negative consequences.
- "Chivalry wasn't about you; you reaped the benefits of it. It was about training men to see you not just as a sexual conquest but as wives and mothers of their children."
- "You've always been complete as women, never lacking in anything. Your divine feminine purpose was, and still is, to inspire men to protect and serve those they love."
- Men are not dogs. You can't buy their loyalty and love. Your sexual treats might temporarily hypnotize men. However, their financial generosity could be purely transactional. Sex in exchange for monetary gifts.
- We are responsible for all the choices we make and the potential outcomes, and we shouldn't blame others for our failures.
- "If most of the men you've dated have treated you as one-night stands, friends with benefits, or placeholders, and none have committed to you in marriage, your dating/relationship market value may be limited to sex in their eyes."
- "Lamentably, if all we have in our relationships is Netflix and chill, then we have nothing."
Join us on this journey as we explore The Consequence of Choice: My Inside Voice.
About the Author :
Bernard R. Pilgrim was born in Barbados, the land of blue seas, white sands, rum, and calypso. He spent his early years in a religious school where he learned to question religious doctrines and social issues. As a talented singer, songwriter, musician, and choir director, he performed at local concerts and international festivals. This led him to music production and opening a recording studio in New York. He also owned and operated a private contracting business for several years. Despite his diverse experiences, he never expected that his skills in creating corporate documents, composing music, and writing song lyrics would lead him to literary work. However, his keen observations of romantic relationship behaviors and numerous conversations with family, friends, and acquaintances have given him unique insights into the complexities of modern relationships. These insights inspired his first book, "The Consequence of Choice: My Inside Voice."
Review :
REVIEWED BY ZARA.ABOOKSTERR.COMSUMMARYThe Consequence of Choice: My Inside Voice explores modern relationship dynamics, arguing that personal choices profoundly influence romantic outcomes. Author Bernard R. Pilgrim addresses topics from dating behaviors and gender roles to the impact of societal and religious doctrines, urging readers to critically examine their "unvetted choices." The book aims to provoke self-reflection on how individual decisions contribute to relationship successes and failures.
PROFESSIONAL REVIEW (4/5 stars)
Bernard R. Pilgrim's book, "The Consequence of Choice: My Inside Voice," tackles modern love with blunt honesty - sometimes uncomfortable, always direct. Drawing from his own life, he attempts to clarify confusion about how people connect romantically. His main idea is that personal choice shapes every relationship path. It pushes readers to reflect on how repeated decisions slowly build the patterns they live by.
The book examines different sides of relationships - like how some men act competitively when dating, almost like it's a game. Whereas women often shape their behaviors based on what they think others expect, guided by something called directed perception. It draws from historical records, especially medical abuse in the southern U.S. around the 1800s, showing how control stripped away women's sense of self. He touches on the subjects of fashion and beauty, which aren't just trends - they're treated like a religion built to influence how women see themselves. Pilgrim breaks down myths and shows what happens when people chase shallow wants instead of real needs.
Pilgrim examines preconceived ideas about gender roles, marriage rules, and religious beliefs - especially around divorce or ending pregnancies. Yet he pushes strongly for what he calls "reproductive responsibility," urging women to take back authority they've lost and act as moral leaders instead of just going quietly along.
While some might see his claims as extreme, especially how much weight he gives to women's choices shaping men's behavior, the book insists we closely examine personal freedom in relationships. In the end, it forces us to think deeply about how big social shifts, past injustices, and small everyday decisions mix together to create today's struggles in love and connection - calling for a shift toward more honest, self-aware ways of relating.
