Big Reactors: Practical Strategies for Parenting Highly Sensitive Children

An invaluable, practical guide that shows parents how to help their highly sensitive child learn to manage their big emotions and thrive. Highly sensitive children (HSCs) process and react to experiences more deeply than other children. They are sometimes called “spirited,” “deeply feeling,” or “big reactors.” These children are amazing-fierce and feisty, persistent and passionate, insightful and empathetic-but are also prone to more intense and frequent meltdowns. Parenting a big reactor can be challenging and exhausting, but it doesn't have to be. In Big Reactors: Practical Strategies for Parenting Highly Sensitive Children, child development specialist Claire Lerner helps parents develop the tools to support their HSC's strengths while also showing them how to cope with everyday challenges. She details the key traits of HSCs, describes the science behind the traits, and shows how parents and other caregivers can help them thrive. Through detailed case descriptions from her decades of work in the trenches, Lerner reveals the process she guides parents through to understand the root cause of their child's challenges and come up with sensitive, effective strategies that work in real life, not just in theory. Importantly, Big Reactors shows parents how they can be supportive and loving while also setting the limits their fierce and feisty kids need to develop self-regulation and build resilience. This approach helps parents bring out the best in their passionate, creative, wonderful, sensitive child and creates more peace and joy for the entire family.

Table of Contents:
Introduction Chapter 1: High Sensitivity: How It's Different from Sensory Processing Disorder, ADHD, Autism, and Anxiety Chapter 2: Intense Emotional and Sensory-Based Reactions Chapter 3: Inflexibility and Intense Need for Control Chapter 4: Anxiety Chapter 5: Cautious and Slow-To-Warm Chapter 6: Perfectionism, Sore Losing, and Low Frustration Tolerance Chapter 7: Relationship Challenges with Siblings and Peers Chapter 8: Understanding and Addressing Other Common Issues Closing Thoughts Resources Bibliography Acknowledgments About the Author

About the Author :
Claire Lerner, MSW, is a licensed clinical social worker and child development specialist. She has been a practicing clinician for more than 35 years, provides training and consultation to preschools and pediatric residents at Children's National Medical Center, and served as the Director of Parenting Resources at ZERO TO THREE for 18 years. She is the author of Why Is My Child In Charge? A Roadmap to Ending Power Struggles, Increasing Cooperation, and Finding Joy in Parenting Young Children. Claire is the mother of two very spirited children and lives in Bethany Beach, Delaware. Learn more at lernerchilddevelopment.com.

Review :
Big Reactors is a lifeline for any parent raising deeply feeling kids. Claire Lerner is a master and her book is full of empathy and wise insights. She replaces guilt and confusion with understanding and concrete strategies that truly work. Claire Lerner speaks with genuine empathy and immense experience to parents who are feeling distraught and confused by typical parenting advice that is failing them-that doesn't reflect the reality of life with these fierce kids. She fills a critical gap by offering insights and tools developed from her decades of experience working with families of big reactors that enable their sensitive, "orchid" kids, and thus their families, to thrive. As a parent to a big reactor, I devoured this book. Lerner translates her decades working with families of highly sensitive children into relatable narratives, weaving in just enough research to establish her expertise with these kids without straying from her common sense, practical approach. She's cracked the art of teaching caregivers how to set compassionate limits with children who have intense reactions to not being in control. With Lerner's guidance, parents can help these kids learn the elusive skills of resilience, frustration tolerance, and flexibility. Parents to big reactors-often left out of advice books-will feel more seen and empowered than ever! Claire Lerner has created the guide many parents have been searching for. Big Reactors is clinically rich, deeply compassionate, and grounded in decades of experience with families of highly sensitive children. Claire helps parents understand their children's behavior, not as “bad” or “difficult” but as deeply feeling and deeply impacted by the world around them. This book is a gift: practical, affirming, and rooted in real science and real life.” Claire Lerner's book, Big Reactors, gets it right for parents of highly sensitive children by offering clear, practical advice and explanations to help them understand how best to meet their child's needs. A broad range of anecdotes will ensure that almost all parents facing these situations will find themselves reflected - and heard - in this valuable book. Big Reactors meets parents where they are by offering compassion, validation, and practical support for raising highly sensitive children. Claire Lerner's insightful book acknowledges the self-doubt many parents feel, reassuring them that while supporting children with big emotions and unique needs is undeniably challenging, it is absolutely possible. Through a responsive, nurturing lens, Big Reactors empowers parents and caregivers with actionable strategies rooted in empathy and connection. The book's approach mirrors the very mindset it encourages-one that is responsive, patient, and attuned to the temperament of “orchid children” who require an individualized approach to thrive.