Et al: Because not all research deserves a Nobel Prize

Et al. is a satirical academic journal that uses machine learning and scientific principles on absurd studies, from the cat Lord Whiskers' role in the extinction of the dodo bird to the quantum mysteries of untidy toddler rooms. Key Features Conducts satirical research on topics ranging from quantum computing to clingy robot dog algorithms Answers questions like “Can a computer understand a Scotsman?” and “Is Sarah Palin real?” Secures the power grid and your home from the prying eyes of government drones a.k.a. birds Expands science by studying cow-based atmospheres, and the flavortown center of the brain Solves climate change and saves the world by proposing a banana-based fission reactor Nullifies the possibility of getting lost at the fair with a mirror-house escape algorithm Book DescriptionTired of the same old math, science, statistics, and programming memes people post online and want something a little more elaborate? This is the book for you. Tremble as we make up all our own facts and data, hand-draw diagrams in MS Paint, and quote from fictional studies and journals. Cower as authors write in the first person because their study is just a little too personal for them. Recoil from the sheer mass of oversimplified methodology, distilling someone's entire thesis into a paragraph of jokes crude enough to make it into a Mike Myers movie. Over the last few years, we have taken arguments that you would normally have after four Jack and cokes at game night and turned them into properly formatted research papers with a writing tone serious enough to confuse the uninitiated. These papers are high-effort jokes by researchers and scientists for researchers and scientists. They cover a range of topics such as the consequences of re-releasing tourists back into Yellowstone National Park after COVID-19, how to play StarCraft competitively online on a quantum computer, and most importantly, how trees around the globe are becoming increasingly radicalized.What you will learn How to draw a graph using MS Paint, maybe Whether Sarah Palin is a figment of your imagination How one pirate cat brought about the extinction of the beloved dodo Why rabbits used to be jerks back in the day If you actually learn anything from these articles, get your memory erased immediately Who this book is forThis book is for researchers and those who love science mingled with humor. It's for those who are a little too tired of the talking heads and futurists of the science world and would like something more entertaining in the form of absurd speculative studies by researchers as unbelievable as their work. Anyone who has experienced academic writing, or the tribulations of any research institution will enjoy the wide range of bizarre, yet real-world topics compiled in this book. Even if you don't know much about the subject, we usually have a background section.

Table of Contents:
Table of Contents

1. The Pirate Kitty Theory: How a House Cat Being Let Out Led to the Extinction of the Dodo Bird
2. Cows All the Way Down: Could Cow-Based Planetoids Support Methane Atmospheres?
3. Ecological Impacts of Re-Releasing Tourists into Yellowstone
4. The Great Rabbit War of 863AD: Myth or Historical Fact?
5. The Cat Homing Infrared Laser Drone Defense (CHILD) System: A Novel Approach to Suburban Defense
6. The Sarah Palin Mandela Effect: How America Believes in a Fictional Politician
7. Utilitarianism, Shame, and Mysticism: Autonomous Vehicle Moral Compass Design and Analysis
8. A Comparative Analysis of Trevor's Mom: Age Estimation Methodology
9. Adaptive Smart Grids for Migratory Government Drones
10. Tracking International Communism Through Mycorrhizal Networks
11. Markov Models for Ruining Your Weekend: A Comparative Study
12. Novel Techniques for Random Number Generation: Toddler Behavioral Sampling
13. Computer Vision Object Permanence Detection Algorithm for My Clingy Robot Dog
14. Flavortown in the Brain: Localizing Generators of Hedonic Food Response in the Forebrains of Foodies
15. A Particle Physics Model of Why My Room Is Never Clean and Why My Mommy Shouldn't Put Me In Time-Out for Something That's Not My Fault
16. Me and My Best Friend Prove the 3n+1 Problem Even Though It's a REALLY Hard Problem
17. A Loopy Belief Propagation Factor Graph Simulation of My Grandma Nonna's Insane Facebook Feed
18. Dietetic Benefits of Simple Carbohydrates and Bovine Byproduct in Low Earth Orbit
19. There Can Be No True Scottish Spoken Language System
20. Quantum Computing Applications in Competitive StarCraft
21. Full-Cycle Banana Fission Reactor Design and Analysis
22. A Computationally Efficient Solution to the SLAM Problem in Houses of Mirrors
23. Ray Tracing and the Optical Design of Healing-Crystal-Constructed Adaptive Optics