About the Book
Impacted by narcissism? You’re not alone.
Celebrity culture drives us to aspire to be like the few who seem to have it all. But is it possible they simultaneously have everything- and nothing?
Behind the glitz, wealth and fame of the celebrities we follow, there is a common trend that impacts all of us. The popular label of “narcissism,” and “narcissist” surfaces in all of our lives and results in self-destructive behaviors common to modern life, including stress, addiction, anxiety, fear, imposter syndrome, infidelity, and depression.
Having treated some of the world’s most successful, wealthiest people and celebrities, Dr. Paul Hokemeyer applies his findings to tell us why so many people get trapped in narcissistic relationship cycles and shows how we can diminish their impact on ourselves and the people we love.
Dr. Paul Hokemeyer (J.D., PH.D.) is the founder of Drayson Mews, a global resource for UHNW individuals, couples and families seeking clinically effective mental and relational health services, a licensed marriage and family therapist and graduate of the Global Leaders in Healthcare program at Harvard Medical School.
In his book, Fragile Power, Dr. Paul shares from the therapist’s chair how feelings of shame, insecurity, abandonment, and emotional pain are all part of the human condition and how all of us, regardless of our levels of wealth, can heal ourselves, our relationships and the world we are privileged to live in.
About the Author :
Dr. Paul believes mental health matters for everyone, everywhere.
A licensed marriage and family therapist, he is a graduate of the Global Leaders in Healthcare program at Harvard Medical School. In his first book, Fragile Power: Why Having Everything is Never Enough, Dr. Paul explores how narcissism and the misuse of narcissistic power when combined with great financial wealth causes individual, relational and social destruction. Dr. Paul has been compared to a modern Irvin Yalom, MD for his ability to capture the essence of the psychotherapeutic relationship through compelling therapist and patient narratives. He and his work have been featured in a variety of leading media outlets including the New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, London's Daily Mail, CNN, and others. He resides with his family in Telluride, Colorado where he can be found shuttling around kids in a late model Toyota 4Runner, communing with mother nature from a camper van, practicing headstands on a yoga mat and singing along with the Indigo Girls, loudly.
Review :
"One of the reasons we read is to empathize. To understand the lives of others. To value experiences not our own. In doing so, quite often we learn about ourselves. Dr. Paul Hokemeyer’s Fragile Power is an illuminating, compassionate study of the mental and emotional issues hiding beneath the veneer of success. His subjects are among the superelite, but his wisdom and insight are relevant to anyone who struggles with identity, shame, and self-worth. An intimate, highly readable book filled with Dr. Paul’s generosity of spirit and grace."
"Freud believed that at a certain point—middle age—it’s impossible to correct a personality disorder. In Fragile Power, Dr. Paul Hokemeyer proves that even the great Sigmund made mistakes. It’s never too late to change, and Hokemeyer explains how to start."
"Fragile Power is a fascinating look into the psychological world of the rich and famous. The incredibly wise Dr. Hokemeyer uses examples that explore topics such as ambition, vanity, sex, and beauty. His examples and techniques are both wildly entertaining and remarkably informative, and allow the reader to empathize with this elite group of curious."
"It’s easy to forget, when you’re in therapy, that the living, breathing human being sitting across from you is experiencing their own range of emotions. In Fragile Power, Dr. Paul Hokemeyer brings that living, breathing human being to life. . . beautifully. A psychological examination that somehow manages to also be a page-turner, Fragile Power reveals the insecurities that the person on the other side of the couch is experiencing while also bringing empathy and understanding to a segment of the population that tends not to receive any. If any book can show you how skewed our societal values are, this is it."
"Dr. Paul reminds us that happiness is an inside job—even for billionaires. This smart and timely book reveals the cultural and economic issues that divide us. Polarization leads us to believe that if we can get past the velvet rope and achieve social identity through wealth and power, it will heal us. Dr. Paul’s core idea is that social cohesion follows from self-awareness, empathy, and connection. No one’s power can buy their way out of that hard work. Important commentary for all."
"Paul Hokemeyer pulls the curtain back, exposing the internal battles of upscale and privileged individuals in our culture. Fragile Power is filled with anecdotal examples where he lays bare the unique types of loneliness, despair, and fragility within the addictive climate of “celebrity,” while exploring the challenges these people face in seeking help and counsel. Hokemeyer reveals the pain behind lavish lifestyles and seemingly enviable situations. A must-read."
"Fragile Power is an important contribution to our understanding of the human being who embodies the paradox of power and powerlessness, of control and vulnerability, of worth and worthlessness—and how when untreated and unresolved, can destroy a life."
"I adore this book! Dr. Paul delicately takes the reader on an explorative journey on every page of Fragile Power. Offering an authentic blend of Paul’s own personal journey . . . with resources and teachings, each chapter weaves an experience with such insightful depth that, as a professional, I felt compelled to keep turning the page. It is a book I will come back to for years to come."
"I highly recommend you pick up this book and read it! Thank you, Dr. Paul, for giving us a peek into your magic world of “fragile power”—a world so few understand. This is a must-read for anyone in the recovery field, and the way it’s written is exactly who Paul is: funny, witty, and compassionate!"
"Wealth. Power. Melancholia? With empathy and insight, Dr. Hokemeyer examines the worlds of successful people—those we admire and emulate—only to find deeply troubled souls at their core. This book provides essential insight into the challenges that face those who, on the surface, embody the perfect human being. Truly a must-read."
"For decades, our culture has been pretending that the upper echelon in the world is too wealthy or powerful to succumb to illness or disease. Dr. Hokemeyer brilliantly addresses this misconception in Fragile Power by sharing his clinical prowess and expertise and presenting successful strategies for behavioral health clinicians worldwide to absorb."
