From Boys to Men: Spiritual Rites of Passage in an Indulgent Age

A guide to restoring the successful models used by ancient cultures the world over to raise adolescent boys • Explains the negative effects of Western youth culture and how it can be transformed • Offers instructions for integrating basic rites of passage into modern family life and youth programs For tens of thousands of years all across the globe, societies have been coping with raising adolescents. Why is it then that native cultures never had the need for juvenile halls, residential treatment centers, mood-altering drugs, or boot camps? How did they avoid the high incidence of teen violence America is experiencing, and how did they prevent their youth from relying on drugs and alcohol, the use of which has become so prevalent in Western society? In From Boys to Men, Bret Stephenson shows readers that older cultures didn’t magically avoid adolescence; instead they developed successful rituals and rites of passage for sculpting teen boys into healthy young men. From Aleutian Eskimos to Polynesian Islanders, from tribal Africans to Australian Aborigines, each culture found archetypal ways to initiate their boys into the adult community. Stephenson explains the basics of rites of passage and offers insight into how to reintroduce these successful practices and traditional understandings into modern family life and programs for youth. He discusses the damaging effects of our youth culture and the negative teen products that are fueled by corporate America and reveals how we can counteract these negative forces by using meaningful rites of passage to create a society with happy and healthy adolescent boys.

Table of Contents:
Foreword by Stephen and Robin Larsen Preface Acknowledgments Introduction Are Our Kids Different? • The Lost Art of Initiation • The Kids Are Not Alright • What You'll Find in This Book 1 Adolescence 101 Developmental Issues of Adolescent Boys • The Search For Identity • Individuation and Leave-Taking • Paradox and Abstraction • Egocentrism • Idealism • A Sense of Pride • Puberty • Sexuality • Non-Ordinary States of Consciousness • Ceremony & Ritual • The Labyrinth or the Maze? 2 The State of the Adolescent Nation What the Heck Happened? • Them versus Us • Sobering Statistics • How It's Been Done Elsewhere 3 The Loss of Initiation Adulthood versus Manhood • A Dubious Role • Adolescence Is a Process, Not a Phase • Elders: The Missing Link • Where Are the Fathers? • The Burden of Single Moms • Life, Death, and Rebirth • Embracing Mystery 4 Rites of Passage Then and Now The Essentials • Pseudo-Initiation • Public or Private? 5 The Hero’s Journey An Archetypal Model for Rites of Passage • Stages of the Hero’s Journey • Refusing the Call to Adventure • Using the Hero’s Journey with Your Adolescent • The Hero’s Journey as a Treatment Model • The Hero’s Journey Continues 6 Modern Rules in An Ancient Game Adolescence as a Cultural Shadow • Fatherlessness • ESL: Emotion as a Second Language • Education or Isolation? • School as Parent • Television as Parent, Teacher, Drug • Shifting Life Stages 7 Nuts and Bolts Approaches The Brick Wall • Redefining Success • Communication Strategies • A Healthy Dose of Humor • What Really Changes Behavior? • The Importance of Consequences • Choices and Control • Some Rules about Making Rules • For Behavior Professionals 8 A Transpersonal Approach Setting the Stage • Outdoor Rituals • Tapping Unconscious Imagery • Writing Poetry and Lyrics • Storytelling • Bundles and Boxes • Creating Tangible Symbols • Putting It All Together 9 The Last Resort A Desert Camp for Desperate Boys • War Stories • What Behavior Management Doesn’t Teach Afterword Bibliography Suggested Reading About the Author Index

About the Author :
Bret Stephenson is a counselor of at-risk and high-risk adolescents and a men’s group facilitator. In addition to his duties as executive director at Labyrinth Center, a facility in South Lake Tahoe offering classes and workshops on adolescent issues for teens and adults, he is currently working on designing and implementing youth employment and youth entrepreneurial projects for teens. He has been a presenter and speaker at the United Nations World Peace Festival and the World Children’s Summit. He lives in Lake Tahoe, California.

Review :
“From Boys to Men is a crucial read for parents, teachers, grandparents, and everyone who makes policies about young men. Bret Stephenson is masterful in his presentation of how to help boys “slay the dragon” and thus find a contributive, healthy, and successful manhood. I highly recommend this book!” “[Stephenson] offers practical models, methods, and activities for changing problematic behavior that draw on a wide range of transition rites that he has recreated for the modern teenage boy. A broad audience will find this a fascinating and hopeful glimpse into the contemporary struggles of American boyhood.” “If the vast sums currently spent on trying to keep teenagers in a failed and punishing school system were spent on projects such as this, a major step toward social health would unfold. Buy this book, put it to use and spread the word.” “This book builds a much needed bridge between contemporary knowledge and the wisdom of indigenous elders, utilizing tools that are familiar to the western experience and infusing them with ancestral spiritual wisdom.” “Bret Stephenson takes a hard look at how we are raising boys and explores how ancient wisdom and traditional practices can be used to help adolescent males become healthy young men and active members of the community.” "Society needs to know these ideas and practices." "A brilliant and practical resource and guide for stewarding adolescent boys into responsible leadership and manhood . . . a must for parents, teachers, leaders, and managers." "[This book] offers up something different: a book which blends cultural and magical insights with parenting and youth reflections for maximum benefit. Any who want an alternative way of coping with adolescents will find FROM BOYS TO MEN packed with spiritual and social insights taken from older cultures versed in rites of passage." "This book should be read by all parents of male children in the affluent world."