Some parents make it all look easy. They always seem to know the right things to do and say, however tricky the situation. They have a seemingly instinctive ability to raise happy, confident, well-balanced children. Children who handle their emotions well, enjoy life, respect others, are decent and thoughtful and stand up for what they believe in.
Is there something these parents know that the rest of us don’t? Is it something we could learn? The answer is a resounding yes. They know The Rules of Parenting. The golden principles and behaviours that will guide you smoothly through the challenges of raising children.
This new edition contains 9 new rules to help you keep calm and in control, and put your children on the path to becoming successful independent adults.
You’ll get more out of being a parent. They’ll become all they can be.
Table of Contents:
Introduction
Rules for staying sane
1. Relax
2. No one is perfect
3. Be content
4. Know what you’re good at
5. Almost any rule can be broken occasionally
6. Don’t try to do everything
7. You don’t have to follow every piece of advice you get (including this one)
8. It's normal to want to escape
9. You’re allowed to hide from your kids
10. Parents are people too
11. Don’t ignore your relationship with your partner
Attitude Rules
12. Love is not enough
13. Every recipe needs different ingredients
14. Anything extreme is almost certainly wrong
15. Look pleased to see them
16. Treat your child with respect
17. Enjoy their company
18. It’s not about you – it’s about them
19. Being tidy isn’t as important as you think
20. Good parenting is calculated risk taking
21. Keep your worries to yourself
22. See things from their point of view
23. Parenting is not a competitive sport
24. Never emotionally blackmail them
Everyday Rules
25. Let them get on with it
26. Let them go (wild)
27. Teach them to think for themselves
28. Use praise wisely
29. Make sure they know what’s important
30. Show them how to lose
31. Know the value of boundaries
32. Bribery doesn't have to be bad
33. Moods are catching
34. You're setting their eating patterns for life
35. Communicate
36. Set clear targets
37. Don’t be a nag
Discipline Rules
38. Present a united front
39. Carrots beat sticks
40. Be consistent
41. Lighten up
42. Focus on the problem, not the person
43. Don't paint yourself into a corner
44. If you lose your temper, you’re the loser
45. Apologise if you get it wrong
46. Let them back in
47. The right of expression
Personality Rules
48. Find out what incentives work for your child
49. Every child should have something they know they're good at
50. Learn to appreciate the qualities that remind you of someone else
51. Look for similiarities between you
52. Find qualities to admire in them
53. Let them be better than you
54. Their attitude is as important as their achievements
55. Keep your fears and insecurities to yourself
56. Mind your programming
57. Don't try to have a perfect child
Sibling Rules
58. Give them each other
59. Recognise that squabbling is healthy (within reason)
60. Teach them to sort out their own arguments
61. Work as a team
62. Let them entertain each other
63. Never compare children with each other
64. Different children need different rules
65. Don’t have a favourite
66. Mix and match
67. Find each child’s strengths
School Rules
68. Schooling isn't the same as education
69. School comes as a package
70. Fight your child's corner
71. Bullying is always serious
72. Teach them to stand up for themselves
73. Put up with friends of theirs you don't like
74. Remember you're their parent, not their teacher
75. Don't mollycoddle them
76. Let up the pressure
77. They have to live with their choices (and it's ok)
Teenage Rules
78. Don't Panic
79. Remember Newton's Third Law
80. Give them a voice
81. Don’t look under the mattress
82. Running around after them doesn't help anybody
83. Don't stand in front of a speeding train
84. Yelling isn't the answer
85. Let them have the last word
86. Everything comes with strings
87. Show some respect for the things they care about
88. Adopt a healthy attitude to sex
Crisis Rules
89. Don’t use your kids as ammunition
90. Let them cope in their own way
91. Being younger doesn't necessarily speed everything up
92. The aftershock can last forever
93. Tell them what’s going on
94. Teach them to fail successfully
95. It's better to agree than to be right
96. All your actions speak louder than any of your words
97. Make sure they know they’re priority no. 1
98. You can’t fix everything
Grown-up Rules
99. Back off
100. Wait until they ask for advice
101. Treat them as adults
102. Don’t try to be their best friend
103. Encourage them regardless
104. You can’t choose who your children love
105. Leave the strings off
106. Don’t guilt-trip them
107. Remember they still need you
108. It’s not your fault
109. Once a parent, always a parent
About the Author :
Richard Templar (Devon, UK) is an astute observer of human behavior who understands what makes the difference between those who effortlessly glide towards success and those who struggle against the tide. He has distilled these observations into his Rules titles, read by more than one million people around the world. His global best-sellers include "The Rules of Life," "The Rules of Money," and "The Rules of Work." His books also include "I Don't Want Any More Cheese: I Just Want Out of the Trap."
