About the Book
Joining Forces: Empowering Male Survivors to Thrive is an inspirational new book written to empower male survivors of sexual victimization to develop skills they can use to overcome the effects of trauma and learn to thrive in their lives. Male survivors often struggle to feel any sense of hope for the future, so this book is designed to inspire survivors and their allies with easily learned skills developed over the course of the author's 30-year career, and the real-life experiences of male survivors who have learned to thrive. Each chapter invites survivors to dare to dream that they can take another step in their healing process through leaving their isolation behind, challenging their dysfunctional beliefs and replacing them with healthier functional messages, practicing healing exercises, reading about the struggles and successes of men just like themselves, and learning how to build hope through the use of affirmations. This book is unique in that it is based on the experiences of over 750 male survivors who have participated in MaleSurvivor Weekends of Recovery. The tools taught during those weekends, plus many more developed through the clinical experiences of the author, are presented so that each survivor reading the book has an opportunity to use the skills as he faces the challenges of his recovery. Survivors and their allies learn they are not alone in their struggles. Including the writings of male survivors and their partners will help to end their isolation and help them know others have walked in their path, become stronger, and found a sense of freedom. They will read about how these men and their allies have learned to make healthier choices that have enhanced their relationships, their emotional functioning, their job performance, and their lives.
About the Author :
Howard Fradkin received his Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology in 1980 from the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill, and has been licensed as a psychologist in Ohio since 1982. Dr. Fradkin co-founded Affirmations: A Center for Psychotherapy and Growth in 1984, a private multidisciplinary practice in Columbus, Ohio. Dr. Fradkin has counseled more than 1,000 male survivors as individuals, as couples, and in group psychotherapy and weekend workshops over the course of his 30-year career. He was one of the co-founders of the National Organization On Male Sexual Victimization (now known as MaleSurvivor), and has served as an Advisory Board member for MaleSurvivor since 2001. In 2001, Dr. Fradkin became the Chairperson of the MaleSurvivor Weekends of Recovery program. In this role, he had the primary responsibility for developing and implementing the weekend experience, supervising staff, and having primary responsibility for overseeing the emotional experiences of all of the male survivors (and sometimes their partners) who participated in the weekend. In 2010, due to the success and growth of the program, it became necessary to share responsibilities for the program, and since that time, he has served as Co-Chairperson. Dr. Fradkin has directed 39 Weekends of Recovery since 2001. His expertise was recognized by Oprah Winfrey when she invited him to be her professional guest for two shows, "200 Men" in 2010, focusing on healing for male survivors of sexual abuse. As a male survivor himself, he has learned firsthand about the struggles inherent in achieving recovery, and is able to offer significant hope and encouragement to empower men to thrive in many aspects of their lives.
Review :
"By blending practical clinical experience with the voices of male survivors, Dr. Fradkin has written a supportive and inspirational book. Joining Forces is a timely, hands-on guide for men who seek to heal from sexual victimization. This book articulates and celebrates the amazing resilience of men who are successfully healing from sexual trauma."---- Jim Struve, LCSW, co-chair, MaleSurvivor Weekends of Recovery; co-author (with Mic Hunter) of The
"Dr. Fradkin's book is an intensely engaging and practical guide to recovery from sexual abuse and assault. But it is so much more than that. It is a heartfelt and genuinely warm invitation to join a community of human beings who are embracing both the real pain of their wounds and the real hope that comes from breaking through isolation, stepping forward on a path toward openness and connection, joining a common cause, and becoming part of a community built on connection and inspired by hope. It is a book that belongs in your backpack as you set off on your journey."---- David Lisak, Ph.D., Forensic Consulting, Boston, Massachusetts
"Dr. Howard Fradkin's book, Joining Forces, is a treasure chest overflowing with gems for adult survivors of child sexual abuse who are seeking support to begin and continue the healing process, and for those who are ready to reclaim their lives and thrive. The book, based on the powerful and effective structure of MaleSurvivor's successful Weekends of Recovery, is actually an adventure for those who want solid and effective tools for healing--not something to fear or dread, as in facing a long-winded, painful process of recovery. Uplifting in a step-by-step way, this book is a golden toolbox of self-reflective and transformative exercises that naturally help garner positive insights and options for realistic and possible change--change that no doubt challenges the seemingly impossible effects of child sexual abuse. "This is more than a book; it's a journey, with a clear sense that we are not alone. Included are personal stories of alumni from the Weekends of Recovery, known in the book as the Silence Breakers. Their honest and vivid stories of personal transformation and reclaimed lives are testimony to the possibilities that open up when one does the important healing work offered in this book. Moreover, as in any hero's journey, there's always a guide to help them on their way. Howard Fradkin, a pioneer and leader in this field, offers his wise and safe counsel, giving thousands of survivors the keys to possibilities ahead. We get the sense that he is one step ahead of us, opening the door to each chapter, where he stands at the threshold, shepherding each reader to a room where sunlight and hope reigns, and 'Daring to Dream' becomes a reality step-by-step."
---- Kathy Barbini and Simon Weinberg, founders of Big Voice Pictures and producers of Boys and Men Hea
"In Joining Forces: Empowering Male Survivors to Thrive, Dr. Howard Fradkin has compassionately and clearly outlined how sexually abused men can move forward to heal. Filled with Dr. Fradkin's wise and insightful guidance and personal stories from Silence Breakers, Joining Forces takes readers on a gentle and reflective journey, moving them from the trauma of their abuse to the power of thriving. This book will be a welcome relief for male survivors who are overwhelmed by their abuse and for professionals who need a clear account of the survivors' struggles."---- Kenneth M. Adams, Ph.D., CSAT, author of Silently Seduced: When Parents Make Their Children Partne
"Joining Forces is a shout-out for those who identify as survivors, for men who wonder about what was done to them and have had no name for it, and for all who love and support them. Dr. Fradkin provides in his writing what he does so beautifully in his life and work: He creates a healing space for men to understand their experience and to remember who they really were from the beginning. Joining Forces not only illuminates one's particular perceptions of what it means to be a male survivor of sexual abuse, but also provides story after inspiring story of men and their partners: their personal struggles, their inevitable challenges, and their incredible triumphs. It is a powerful template for reclaiming what is most essential to any survivor--being a strong, sensitive man who is capable of connecting with himself and others. In so doing, Joining Forces will challenge those who read it to take the risk to live more honestly, with greater freedom, integrity, and joy. It is a tremendous gift and an invaluable resource to all of us."-- Mikele Rauch, LMFT, author of Healing the Soul after Religious Abuse: The Dark Heaven of Recovery
"As a co-founder of MaleSurvivor and the co-chair of our Weekends of Recovery program, Dr. Fradkin has helped thousands of survivors of sexual abuse put their lives back together. His skill, compassion, and generosity are evident from the very first words of this book. I am both a survivor of sexual abuse and alumnus of the MaleSurvivor Weekends of Recovery, and I can bear witness to the transformative impact of the wisdom contained within this book. Every year, millions of survivors and their loved ones find help for healing through our website and the practices Dr. Fradkin helped put into place. I highly recommend this book to every survivor of sexual abuse and those people who love, care for, or wish to help support them." -- Christopher M. Anderson, Executive Director, MaleSurvivor (www.MaleSurvivor.org)
"For many years Dr. Howard Fradkin has inspired male survivors of sexual abuse to affirm themselves and move beyond the prisons of their childhood trauma. The Weekends of Recovery program he instituted through MaleSurvivor: The National Organization Against Male Sexual Victimization has brought together men from a wide range of backgrounds and experiences and taught them to help one another heal. Now he has written a book that will bring his wisdom to a much larger audience. Men who read it will find their inner strengths through exercises, storytelling, and a range of empowering affirmations. It will inspire survivors to heal and move on in their lives. His book is a gift to all traumatized men."-- Richard B. Gartner, Ph.D., Training and Supervising Analyst, Faculty, and Founding Director of Sexual Abuse Service and William Alanson White Institute for Psychiatry, Psychoanalysis, and Psychology, New York City; author of Beyond Betrayal: Taking Charge of Your Life after Boyhood Sexual Abuse and Betrayed as Boys: Psychodynamic Treatment of Sexually Abused Men (www.richardgartner.com)
"Howard Fradkin has written a practical and useful guide for the healing of male survivors. His compassionate work is not just another book of survivors' stories or a technical explanation of the process of victimization, but it also incorporates exercises that survivors can use to begin the road to recovery as well as grow to become 'thrivers.' "As the mental-health expert on the groundbreaking Oprah Winfrey show that featured 200 male survivors, Dr. Fradkin helped explain the effects of victimization to an audience perhaps unfamiliar with this all-too-common experience that affects one in six men. In leading dozens of healing retreats for men, Dr. Fradkin has the understanding born of decades of practice. He has a clear knowledge of the dynamics and issues for survivors, and provides exercises for men to use in a clear and functional way.
"I like this book, and it is a valuable addition to the shelf of any male survivor, loved one, or professional working with this population."
-- Ken Singer, MSW, author of Evicting the Perpetrator: A Male Survivor Guide to Recovery from Childhood Sexual Abuse
"Howard Fradkin is a leader in recovery for male survivors, personally and professionally. From his extensive experience, he has created a recovery workbook that is a positive contribution to the growing body of literature on male sexual victimization and recovery. In an encouraging and affirming tone, Joining Forces offers specific exercises and suggestions of healing activities. Like his workshop leadership, this book will be of great benefit to many men in recovery and those who love them."-- Mike Lew, author of Victims No Longer: The Classic Guide for Men Recovering from Sexual Child Abuse
"The combination of Dr. Fradkin's years of clinical experience and the personal recoveries of the men and women with whom he collaborated makes for a powerful resource. It provides male survivors and their loved ones with straightforward, practical guidance and inspires hope. -- Mic Hunter, Psy.D., licensed psychologist and licensed marriage and family therapist, and author of Abused Boys: The Neglected Victims of Sexual Abuse and Honor Betrayed: Sexual Abuse in America's Military
"The title of Howard Fradkin's book, Joining Forces: Empowering Male Survivors to Thrive, captures the essence of the healing process for males with a history of trauma: breaking isolation and silence, establishing connection with others, working through shame and developing personal empowerment, and resolving the past in the interest of the future. The use of survivor testimonials is highly effective. The writings of the Silence Breakers are both moving and explanatory; they articulate the struggle but also the gains made in the process of healing. Although this book was written specifically for male survivors to identify their particular issues and needs, female survivors will benefit from it as well. I highly recommend this book for all adult survivors."-- Christine A. Courtois, Ph.D., ABPP, psychologist in private practice, Courtois & Associates, PC, Washington, D.C.; author of Healing the Incest Wound: Adult Survivors in Therapy (revised edition) and Recollections of Sexual Abuse: Treatment Principles and Guidelines; and co-editor (with Julian Ford) of Treating Complex Traumatic Stress Disorder: An Evidence-Based Guide
"Thoughtful . . . thorough . . . a must-read for men who may have had an unwanted or abusive sexual experience in childhood or adulthood and for the people who love those men. Howard Fradkin's book will be 'top shelf' in our lending library." -- Steve LePore, Founder and Executive Director, 1in6 (www.1in6.org)
