A bold and healing guide to rediscovering ecstasy through sex, spirit, and radical self-acceptance. From Barbara Carrellas—trailblazing author of the beloved Urban Tantra—comes The Book of Ecstasy, a fully revised and expanded edition of her cult classic Ecstasy Is Necessary. With warmth, clarity, and fierce compassion, Carrellas reclaims the word ecstasy as a deeply personal and accessible experience of joy, aliveness, and connection—not something reserved for mystics or perfect bodies, but available to anyone willing to listen to their own truth. This is a book for anyone who has ever felt left out of mainstream conversations about sex, pleasure, or identity—especially those seeking “something more” beyond the norm. Updated with vital new content on boundaries, consent, and neurodiversity, The Book of Ecstasy also includes an important new chapter on what happens when ecstasy feels impossible—or too overwhelming to manage. Carrellas writes for those who are healing from trauma, navigating illness, or mourning the loss of their old sexual selves, while also naming and normalizing powerful energetic and emotional states that are often misunderstood. Blending practical tools, spirituality, and decades of embodied experience, this book offers a fiercely inclusive and radically affirming path to ecstasy—for every body, in every season of life.
About the Author :
Barbara Carrellas is the founder of Urban Tantra(R), an approach to conscious sexuality that adapts and blends a wide variety of sacred sexuality practices from Tantra to BDSM. She is the author of Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-first Century--the world's first LGBTQ+-inclusive Tantric sex book, Ecstasy is Necessary: A Practical Guide to Sex, Relationships and Oh So Much More, and Luxurious Loving. Her books, workshops, and lectures are an eclectic mix of sexual and spiritual practices designed to encourage readers and participants of all genders and sexual preferences to expand their capacity for both pleasure and spiritual fulfillment.
Urban Tantra(R) is an international community, a philosophy, and an inclusive conscious sexuality practice that supports both personal and professional goals. Barbara is also the founder of the Urban Tantra(R) Professional Training Program, a comprehensive training program in the practice and application of conscious sexuality. She is also the co-founder of Erotic Awakening, a pioneering series of workshops focusing on the physical, spiritual and healing powers of sex. She was named Best Tantric Sex Seminar Leader in New York City by Time Out/NY Magazine, and was presented with a Lifetime Achievement Award at the Sexual Freedom Awards in London. Barbara is a proud graduate of the Coney Island Sideshow School with a double major in fire eating and snake handling.
Review :
"This informative, fun, irreverent book was a joy to read. It teaches us to open to ecstasy, embrace our bodies, spirits, and our lives. Barbara is a joyous teacher who helps her readers empower their deepest sensual selves." --Judith Orloff M.D., author of The Ecstasy of Surrender
"Essential reading for anybody trying to attain new levels of intimacy and intensity, not only in their sex lives but in their lives as a whole." --Janet W. Hardy, co-author of The Ethical Slut and Radical Ecstasy
"The Book of Ecstasy is about fine tuning your relationship to pleasure. Not performing it. Not earning it. Not waiting for someone else to unlock it for you. Barbara Carrellas writes with warmth and fearless clarity, reminding us that erotic energy lives inside us and it's available when we slow down enough to listen." --Emily Morse, Doctor of Human Sexuality, host of Sex With Emily, and bestselling author of Smart Sex
"Readers will find important, unexpected doorways to undreamed-of sexual pleasure." --Betty Dodson, Ph.D., author of Sex for One
"Barbara Carrellas is a brilliant writer. She has a unique way of making her readers feel comfortable exploring avenues of sexuality they have longed to know about. To Barbara, being sexual is as normal and comfortable as breathing, and she would like all of us to feel this way." --Louise Hay, author of You Can Heal Your Life
"A generous, gentle exploration of ecstatic experience that finds a way in for everybody. Barbara Carrellas has been such an inspiration to me." --Katherine May, author of Wintering and Enchantment
"In these darkest of times, Barbara Carrellas brings us a soothing balm in the form of The Book of Ecstasy. In Carrellas' signature style, we are led back home to center, where love, joy and ecstasy not only meet, but collaborate. I simply cannot think of a more helpful elixir to ease the burden of weary souls in need of sustenance. A must-read for lovers, therapists, coaches and activists alike." --Cyndi Darnell, author of Sex When You Don't Feel Like It
"Barbara Carrellas is the world's best ecstasy coach! With her signature brilliance, passion for pleasure, big-hearted wisdom and vast experience as an international sex educator, she will open you up to new flavors of erotic energy and types of orgasms you didn't even know were possible. The Book of Ecstasy is a sparkling, orgasmic, life changing manifesto. Just say yes!" --Annie Sprinkle, Ph.D., author of Explorer's Guide to Planet Orgasm--for Every Body
"The exact book we need for these troubled, and troubling, times. Cultivating ecstasy as a spiritual practice, far from being selfish or shallow, allows us to live more fully in the world, with energy and love to spare, and share." --Nina Hartley, author of Nina Hartley's Guide to Total Sex
"Barbara Carrellas is a true visionary. This is a masterful, engaging work of art that combines profound and expansive ideas about sexuality with really practical, useful exercises that everyone can do. As you wrap your mind, body, and spirit around these exciting concepts, Barbara is there every step of the way--a wise, generous, reassuring voice helping you through a radical process of transformation. Yes, this book will give you the tools to create a bolder, more authentic and satisfying sex life, but it goes much deeper: it's a road map for living a fuller, more conscious and joyful life." --Tristan Taormino, author of Opening Up
"If there's anyone who can serve as a guide to ecstasy, it's Barbara! What it is, how it works, how to find it and nourish --this book will take you there. Personal examples, how-to's, guides and insights. Thank you Barbara!" --Dr. Betty Martin, author of The Art of Receiving and Giving: the Wheel of Consent
"A transformative and insightful resource for anyone looking to expand their understanding of pleasure, intimacy, and connection. Blending interesting perspectives with practical guidance, this book offers powerful new ways to think about sexuality, energy, and human connection. A compelling and essential read." --Dr. Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, author of How Do You Like It?: A Guide for Getting What You Want (in Bed)
