Emotion, Seduction and Intimacy: Alternative Perspectives on Organisation Behaviour

From the Author: What can I say? This book is a natural evolution for me after finishing a study on which I worked full-time for three years. It was written to take a break from academic writing but as it developed I found more secrets of life revealing themselves to me and I quickly got hooked. My emotions were fired as everything else stopped to finish the text. The content of the book is purposely aimed at working people, particularly managers and professionals, who want to understand how seduction and sexuality are continually used to develop the relationships upon which business (and families) depend. It may find favour with a secondary group studying or teaching business, psychology, philosophy, gender studies, governance, sociology, human rights, politics and law. Life is an endless process of probing and searching for satisfying relationships for the purpose of economic and social gain. We constantly try to seduce each other for different reasons. Beyond seduction to satisfy our sexual desires, there are employers seducing employees (and vice versa), salespeople seducing customers, consultants seducing clients, advertisers seducing consumers, writers seducing readers, musicians seducing listeners, and academics, scientists, religious leaders and politicians presenting seductive versions of 'the truth'. I have adopted techniques common in social science to minimise authorial bias. One method is to focus on conversations taking place around us, rather than relying on one-off interviews. Nevertheless, I have my own biases. I write about issues that interest and concern me first and foremost. One purpose of the book introduction, therefore, is to set out my concerns to you so that you the reader can assess the extent to which this impacts on what I say in the book. My own interest is the way emotion and intimacy drives the way we govern each other and to organise ourselves into social groups. By looking at conversations, it is possible to discover that productive relationships, generally, are far more equitable than we realise. Only when one party wants to punish the other do relationships change dramatically. When hostility is triggered, one party cuts off or alters the way they communicate. Sometimes they start shaping situations so they can hurt those who they think have hurt them. When this happens, we discover how power is organised, because one party is usually able to punish 'the other' more completely and effectively than the other way around. The desire to punish is rooted in emotional hurt so a key objective of this book is to show where emotional hurt comes from, and the ways that people punish each other when it occurs. The results, I have no doubt, will shock you and perhaps even rock your world a bit - at least I hope it does.

Table of Contents:
Introduction iAcknowledgements iForeword - Dr Poonam Thapa iiiForeword - Caroline Ridley-Duff ivRory's Response viWinning and Losing viiThe Story So Far... viiiThe Science of Emotion xiMy Personal Concerns and Interests xiiThe Structure of the Book xvChapter 1 - In the Beginning... 1Overview 1A Perspective on Sexism 3No Sex Please - We're British! 7Setting the Agenda for Equality 9To the Reader 11Chapter 2 - What are Emotions? 15Overview 15Emotional Knowledge 19Pavlov's Dogs 20The Three Key Areas of the Brain 22Stories of Emotional Intelligence 23Some Personal Stories 26Emotional Defence and Emotion Management 27Emotion, Blame and Social Status 29Emotion and Perception 30Emotion and Sense-Making 32Emotional Sensitivity and Performance 34Summary 35Chapter 3 - Friendship and Flirting 38Introduction 38What is Seduction? 41Defining Seduction and Intimacy 48Seduction and Emotion 51Seduction in Business 52Summarising the Seduction Process 55Defining Intimacy 56Corporate Seduction 59Perspectives on Culture Management 59Contradictions in Corporate Seduction 60Recruitment 61The Effects of Supply and Demand 64Induction 65Formal Company Events 66Consultations 68Seduction in the Sales Process 70What Happens if the Seduction Fails? 73The Paradox of 'Caring' 74Management Knowledge and Seduction 76Summary 77Chapter 4 - Control and Discipline 84Overview 84Why Control and Discipline? 89Threats to Equity and Reciprocity 91Stories of Discipline and Control 92Hearing the Characters Speak for Themselves 95Brenda and Ben on Each Other 96Feelings and Motives During Disciplining 103Diane's Motives 104Brenda's Motives 105Harry's Motives 105Ben's Motives 106Some Thoughts on the Conflict 107The Impacts of Disciplining 108Social Influence During Disputes 109A Second Case 111Exploring the Company History 112The Dynamics of Discipline and Control 117An Alternative 119The Mondragon Cooperatives 120The Impacts of Mondragon's Governance System 124Summary 126Chapter 5 - Leaders and Followers 130Introduction 130The Five Components of Power 138Bottom Up and Top Down Leaders 139Debating the Process of Leadership 142Laughter Dynamics 144Hazing and Harassment 146The Power of Passivity 148Definitional Problems with 'Harassment' 150A Second Case 152An Alternative Explanation 155Reconsidering the Nature of Leadership 158Summary 160Chapter 6 - Sexual Conflict 164Introduction 164A Story of Sexual Conflict 165First Cause for Concern 169Banter Over Lunch 170The End Game 172Management Intervention 174Obtaining Legal Advice 177The Legal Position 178Discussion 180The Impact of the Women's Movement 182Confronting the Double-Standard 182The Double-Standard - A Personal Journey 187From Personal to Professional 190The Reaction to Raising Concerns 192The Current State of the Gender Equality Debate 193Controlling 'People Like Phil' 194The Roots of the Double-Standard 195Obstacles to Resolving Sexual Conflicts 196Are Men 'Naturally' Violent? 198Cultural Images of Violence During Courtship 199The Impact of Beliefs about Violence 200The "Problem" of Courtship 202Impacts on Gender Conflict 203The Level of Truthful Allegations 204How Can Managers Respond? 205Summary 205Chapter 7 - Coping Strategies 211An Introduction 211The Impacts of Intimacy at Work 213Carol and Richard 215Tackling the Intimacy "Problem" 217The Hypocrisy of "Professionalism" 219Secrecy and Power 220Harassment 222The Centrality of Sexuality 223Patterns in the Data 224The Case for Change 227New Approaches to Handling Conflict 228The Case for Mediation 231Compulsion and Conflict 232Broader Political Issues 233Leaders, Performers and Followers 237Powerful Relationships are Tolerant 239Chapter 8 - Closing Thoughts... 244Conclusions 244Appendix A - Body Language 246Introduction 246Speech Code 249Vocal Code 253Body Language Code 256Facial Code 261Bibliography, References and Recommended Reading 265For Those With a Casual or Professional Interest 265For Those With a Strong or Academic Interest 267Index 273

About the Author :
Dr Rory Ridley-Duff combines the world of practitioner and academic. As the director of two companies, Rory is active as a writer and publisher of books and music. Since 2003, he has been on the staff of Sheffield Hallam University where he lectures in Organisation Behaviour, Equal Opportunities and Employee Relations. He continues to research gender issues and social enterprise governance.

Review :
ReviewIn this book, Rory is a man who has deliberately chosen the left-hand path of progress. He does not shun the moral maze of human desires and passions but brings greater understanding to that very facet of life - the forbidden fruit that made us fall from grace - and its role in our emancipation. --Dr. Poonam Thapa, a campaigner for sexual and human rights for over 30 years ReviewRory's work is insightful and helps to redress some of the imbalances in the feminist theory of patriarchy while simultaneously introducing the concepts of gender and intimacy to the subject of enterprise governance. --Professor Phil Johnson, Head of HRM and Organisational Behaviour, Sheffield University