The Only Way Through Is Out

Suzette Mullen had been raised to play it safe—and she hated causing others pain. With college and law degrees, a kind and successful husband, two thriving adult sons, and an ocean-view vacation home, she lived a life many people would envy. But beneath the happy facade was a woman who watched her friends walk boldly through their lives and wondered what was holding her back from doing the same. Determined to live her next chapter differently, Suzette dug into her past and uncovered a deeply buried truth: she’d been in love with her best friend—a woman—for nearly two decades—and still was. Leaning into these “unspeakable” feelings would put Suzette’s identity, relationships, and life of privilege at risk. After months of inner turmoil and soul-searching, Suzette chose the riskier route, leaving her marriage for a chance at feeling fully alive. Her initial euphoria evaporated under the oppressive weight of reality: insomnia, illnesses, the election of Donald Trump, a mouse-ridden rental, blizzards, divorce negotiations, online dating, and the news that her husband already had a girlfriend. But when she found herself at her lowest, Suzette called a friend who helped her pick up the pieces. Coincidences populated her visit to her friend’s town, as if the universe was saying, “we’ve been waiting for you.” Finally fully and publicly embracing her true self, Suzette built a life in her new home, with a new girlfriend by her side. Bittersweet and empowering, The Only Way Through Is Out is both a coming-out and coming-of-age story, as well as a call to action for every human who is longing to live authentically but is afraid of the cost.

Table of Contents:
Author’s Note Part One The Path The Unspeakable The Man I Love Listen and Lean In Zone of Privacy The Real Part Two Open Doors The Talk Sacred Vows LaLa Land Future Stories Heart Friends Sticky Wicket Brave Part Three The Family Coming Out My Power The Dating Game The Ledger Choices and Consequences The Plagues Doubt Surrender Part Four Detour Concern This Way Threshold Home Acknowledgments

About the Author :
Suzette Mullen is the founder of Your Story Finder nonfiction book coaching and a founding board member of the Lancaster (PA) LGBTQ+ Coalition. Her “tiny love story,” the seed which became this book, was published in the New York Times “Modern Love” column.

Review :
An honest and insightful delve into coming out later in life, The Only Way Through Is Out is filled with tears, laughter, and, above all, hope." - Lara Lillibridge, author of Girlish: Growing Up in a Lesbian Home "I could not put this book down. Suzette shows us the search for one’s authentic self has no expiration date and is worth whatever it takes. This book is a glorious tale of tenacious courage that any woman searching for her path in life will love." - Jennifer Louden, national bestselling author of Why Bother? Discover the Desire for What’s Next "In The Only Way Through Is Out, Suzette Mullen reveals how she unearthed her true sexual identity from beneath a mountain of cultural, familial, and internalized heteronormativity. Swimming upstream, she emerges in midlife as the heroine of her own story, and as inspiration to any reader struggling to express their most authentic self." - Robin Rinaldi, author of The Wild Oats Project: One Woman’s Midlife Quest for Passion at Any Cost