There is No Wall

There Is No Wall is ultrarunner Allie Bailey's brutally honest and sometimes shocking account of alcoholism, depression and severe mental breakdowns which almost cost her her life. Told with disarming vulnerability, heartbreaking depth of feeling and dark humour, this isn't a story about how running saved her – she was already running and at the height of her struggles sometimes even winning 100-mile-plus races. But somewhere between the darkest excesses of the music industry and the simple beauty of the ultrarunning scene, Allie found space to listen, learn and put into practice techniques that would go on to save her life and change it for the better. There Is No Wall is a story about how doing something you love can lead you to achieve things you never thought possible. Running won't save you, but it might buy you the time to save yourself. AUTHOR: Allie Bailey is an ultrarunner, coach, speaker and podcaster who has run in some of the most extreme places in the world. She was the first woman to run 100 miles across frozen Lake Khövsgöl in Mongolia and to run the full length of the Panama Canal. She has crossed the inhospitable Namib Desert three times, run the length of the Outer Hebrides and completed a 1,000-mile off-road version of the classic Land's End to John o'Groats route in just thirty days. Allie has finished over 200 marathons and ultramarathons all over the world, but the most remarkable thing about all of these achievements is that she accomplished most of them while battling depression and alcoholism. Although running ultimately became the vehicle that helped buy Allie the time to recover from a number of severe mental health breakdowns, it did not save her. In fact, there were times when it made her battle all the more difficult. After a seismic mental health crisis in 2021, Allie finally admitted to herself and those around her that she was an alcoholic and started her recovery. She left behind a dream career with major record labels and adventure companies and now works as a coach with a broad range of runners and endurance athletes, helping them unlock their full potential. In 2022, she was named as one of the most inspiring female adventurers in the UK by the Guardian, and she has appeared on numerous mainstream TV programmes including The One Show and Lorraine. She lives in Yorkshire with her rescue dog, Pickle.

Table of Contents:

• Introduction: The stories we believe are the ones we tell ourselves the most
• PART ONE: THE AWAKENINGS
• Blog One: A prologue to madness (2017)
• I: How the fuck did this happen?
• II: You are so lucky
• III: Running won’t save you
• PART TWO: THE RECKONINGS
• Blog Two: Down and out in Paris (and London) (2017)
• I: Well, that escalated quickly
• II: Love is a four-letter word
• III: There is a rock bottom
• PART THREE: THE REALISINGS
• Blog three: I wanted to be invisible. At my lowest I just wanted to be dead (2021)
• I. Take the pieces and build them skywards
• II. Mind the gap, please.
• III. Dear Reader (protect your magic)
• EPILOGUE
• Blog Four: Until you’re broken, you don’t know what you’re made of. Taking the ride of my life on the Wild Horse 200 (2023)

Allie Bailey is an ultrarunner, coach, speaker and podcaster who has run in some of the most extreme places in the world. She was the first woman to run 100 miles across frozen Lake Khövsgöl in Mongolia and to run the full length of the Panama Canal. She has crossed the inhospitable Namib Desert three times, run the length of the Outer Hebrides and completed a 1,000-mile off-road version of the classic Land’s End to John o’Groats route in just thirty days. Allie has finished over 200 marathons and ultramarathons all over the world, but the most remarkable thing about all of these achievements is that she accomplished most of them while battling depression and alcoholism. Although running ultimately became the vehicle that helped buy Allie the time to recover from a number of severe mental health breakdowns, it did not save her. In fact, there were times when it made her battle all the more difficult. After a seismic mental health crisis in 2021, Allie finally admitted to herself and those around her that she was an alcoholic and started her recovery. She left behind a dream career with major record labels and adventure companies and now works as a coach with a broad range of runners and endurance athletes, helping them unlock their full potential. In 2022, she was named as one of the most inspiring female adventurers in the UK by The Guardian, and she has appeared on numerous mainstream TV programmes including The One Show and Lorraine. She lives in Yorkshire with her rescue dog, Pickle.